Exam oh Exam

The examination room was noisy with rustling of papers as the students busily flipping through their question booklets. There were 5 more minutes remaining. "Ya Allah, thank you for giving me the strength to go through this exam," i said silently to myself. Nervously, i began checking my answers on the question booklet. As i came to the last page of the booklet, i gasped. I only answered half of the last question! "Ya Allah...," i uttered.

"Time! Put your pens down!" the invigilator spoke sternly at the mic. I immediately obeyed, but i was disappointed that i did not have the time to check the last question. 3 marks gone, i thought. "Astaghfirullah.."

On the way back to Ororke Hall, my two friends were excited discussing the exam, but i was not in the mood. I was trying to make some sense. I felt so, small. How i am weak when it comes to the fact that Allah controls my fate. I studied all week for the test, searched for past year papers, had study discussions with friends... but no... i still make faults and it happened because Allah wanted it to be that way...It's qada' and qadar (fate). Allah mentioned in the Quran that He knows matters that humans do not know. We as His slaves should believe that whatever happened upon us is in His best interest. What looks good to us may not look good to Him. And what appear to us as bad, may make us look respectable in the eyes of Allah.

"Astaghfirullah.." i uttered a few times. if this is what He wanted it to be, then I am more than willing to surrender everything to Him. I can only do so much, but yes, Allah controls my life and I am more than happy to accept it.

I came home and performed my Isha' prayers, after that asked for His forgiveness. Indeed i felt grateful that Allah gave me this tarbiyyah, because it makes me think and not forget the fact that we His slaves are defenseless and weak, therefore we must always not forget who we are in this world. So, humble yourself....at all times...because you have no reason to be arrogant about =)